the zoner's prayer

Category: Writers Block

Post 1 by midnight sun (you can't catch me, i'm the palobread man) on Sunday, 21-Dec-2008 8:17:52

at christmas time, we all become more religious. well, not really, this is just the product of the mind of someone on a caffeine rush and too much time to waste.
it's not meant to offend anyone, but this doesn't necessarily mean it wont succeed in doing it.
i can't believe i'm posting this...

the zoner's prayer

in the name of the admins, the cl's, and the holy randomizer, amen.
oh god of randomization, creator of the zone, place that slowly stole every single trace of sanity i had in me. i humbly

raise my prayers to thee, grant me the ability of finding a new love of my life every week.
give me a new zoner to cyber with every day.
let the randomizer be kind to me so that my poor soul may be free from the pains of randomization.
may my ignore list be forever empty, and no trace of my name be in the ignore lists of my fellow zoners.
piss shit fuck prick tits bitch cunt whore dick cum ass suck cock wank just because i can.
may i have my own graffiti board where i can complain about how mean the other zoners are, the 13th love of my life of the

month being a bastard, jaws and nfb.
let my voicemail box always be full of new voicemails, and strike with lightning those who give a low rating to my audio profile.
make me the coolest and most popular zoner so a lot of kids will do all kinds of stuff to be like me.
grant me the gift of a life so that my name wont appear on the top five quicknote posters and i will stop writing things like this one.
keep the creepy weirdos away from me, give me the strenght to overcome the drama that never ends, and protect me from fake quicknotes, amen.
in the name of all multiple accounts, the broken tos, and all the banned zoners, amen.

be blessed my brothers and sisters, bleedin' fathers, old lads and lasses, and may your faith always be strong.
go in peace, get the fuck out of this damned church, and leave me alone if today's sermon made no sense at all, the priest is all hung over, has a headache from hell, and needs a wank.
see you next sunday here in church, or burn in hell.

Post 2 by Izzito (This site is so "educational") on Sunday, 21-Dec-2008 8:26:06

really awesome hahaha keep up the good work

Post 3 by SEPTEMBER-TWILIGHT (CAN I TALK? PLEASE?) on Sunday, 21-Dec-2008 8:31:04

omg lory, I fucking love you! omg, hahahahahahahha. seirously, best thing ever, rofl

Post 4 by PorkInCider (Wind assisted.) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 8:21:15

I love you Lory, even if the idea of your own Graffiti board was stolen from me. lmao this is great. I'm off to begin learning the words.

Post 5 by Nitrogen (Zone BBS Addict) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 9:09:42

well done Lory, rofl, gonna remember this one!

Post 6 by midnight sun (you can't catch me, i'm the palobread man) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 10:12:37

true that it was your idea kevin, but once you told me i needed to go and complain that i should have my own graffiti board, so what better way than to ask god?
and again can't believe i posted this, especially now that i'm not on a caffeine rush lol

Post 7 by SingerOfSongs (Heresy and apostasy is how progress is made.) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 12:18:45

LMAO Very nice.

Post 8 by Click_Clash (No Average Angel) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 12:47:31

Fuckin lmfao. This should be posted as a system message on Christmas Day.

Post 9 by cumbiambera2005 (i just keep on posting!) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 12:51:20

Omg yes I agree! They should do it at midnight or so then we all may just break the log in record hahaahaha!

Post 10 by Albanac (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 13:34:13

Preach it sister lory! lmao to you adn Becky. Agreed they should post it as a system message too.

Post 11 by Elenhiia (Feather'rr'rr'rr'rr'rr'rr'rr'rr'rr'rr for president!) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 21:02:15

Totally agreed, that's the dedicated zoner's dream and they should make it a system message. But post it round the middle of the day or something. Give a specific time and time-zone so we might break the record and see it, yay!
But won't the server crash at 200 users? And our last record was 184, hmmmm, don't know how we'll accomplish that.
Omg. I've been around for over a year, I just realized... how scary. lol

Post 12 by Miss Gorgeous (I'm going for the prolific poster awards!) on Monday, 22-Dec-2008 21:32:33

Well done. Good job to whoever wrote this thing. Laugh out loud. This should be posted somewhere in the site where everyone can see this magnificent piece of writing lol! I had tons of laugh readint this thing.

Post 13 by soaring eagle (flying high again!) on Tuesday, 23-Dec-2008 9:16:12

hahahaa this was really funny and good!

Post 14 by Sword of Sapphire (Whether you agree with my opinion or not, you're still gonna read it!) on Tuesday, 23-Dec-2008 10:13:43

Lmao! This was absolutely hilarious! I really like it. Well done, my dear.

Post 15 by Morgan_Lynn (Account disabled) on Wednesday, 24-Dec-2008 7:03:02

Lmaooo Lory! I love you to pieces! And yes, it should be posted s a system messige.

3
Morgan
P.S.
Mary Christmas to all!

Post 16 by SunshineAndRain (I'm happily married, a mom of two and a fulltime college student.) on Wednesday, 11-Feb-2009 2:39:15

Great job! I absolutely loved it, and found it to be quite accurate! Scary, isn't it?

Post 17 by Brooke (I just keep on posting!) on Wednesday, 11-Feb-2009 9:03:03

ROFLMAO!!! I didn't see this when it was originally posted. That was great!

Post 18 by TheAsianInvasion (The Zone's invader) on Saturday, 07-Mar-2009 6:13:18

lmfaoooo this is great...

Post 19 by Gracesong (Zone BBS is my Life) on Saturday, 07-Mar-2009 7:06:04

Lory! This is freaking hilarious!
I should know about the creepy weirdoes... I've had enough of them stalking me before. Thank God not now!
ROFLLMAO!!!
Keep up the good work!